14x10 – The Tie that Binds
Outside the theater
Mason Green: So... What did you think?
Haley Chase: Oh, I loved it. Thank you, Daddy.
Mason Green: Logan?
Logan Chase: Uh, pass.
Haley Chase: Come on. It wasn't that bad.
Logan Chase: Well, not the first eight times, no, but if I had known this was a Green holiday tradition, I would have shot myself on our wedding night.
Haley Chase: Oh, such a hopeless romantic.
Mason Green: Ugh. There's my ride. Should we do this again next week?
Logan Chase: I'd rather lick a chalkboard.
Mason Green: Yeah. I bet you would.
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Car
Anton Vlastefin: Welcome, Captain.
Mason Green: Thank you.
Anton Vlastefin: Can I interest you in a charge? Or water for the ride?
Mason Green: Uh, water's fine, thanks.
Anton Vlastefin: There you go.
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Anton Vlastefin: I haven't seen The Nutcracker in years. It still hold up?
Mason Green: I don't know. I never watch the performance, just my little girl's face... It still lights up every time... Every time that...
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Gibbs's house: living room
Tobias Fornell: What?! What on earth are you doing?
Emily Fornell: Me? What are you doing, Dad?
Tobias Fornell: I was sleeping.
Emily Fornell: I noticed. Still on Uncle Gibbs' couch for some reason.
Tobias Fornell: You nearly scared me to death. And Uncle Gibbs is probably upstairs loading his bazooka as we speak.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: No. I'm good.
Tobias Fornell: Thanks for the warning... I thought you weren't back from school till tomorrow.
Emily Fornell: My boyfriend got off work a day early, but no way am I introducing him to you while you're living on a couch.
Tobias Fornell: I'm not living. I am... Recuperating.
Emily Fornell: Okay, well, you can recuperate at home where I can make sure you do the exercises Gibbs says you're not doing.
Tobias Fornell: Really? That's what he says? Fine. I'll do my exercises... Hey, Gibbs. You got to come over and push down on my pelvis.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: I'm gonna pass on that.
Tobias Fornell: See? See what I'm up against? How can I do my exercises if...? Did you say boyfriend? I heard boyfriend, did you hear boyfriend?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: No.
Emily Fornell: Yes, you heard boyfriend. His name is Jack, and he's studying to be an entomologist.
Tobias Fornell: Ento...
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Bugs.
Tobias Fornell: I know what an entomologist is.
Emily Fornell: This is your fault. You enabled him.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Me?
Tobias Fornell: You are not old enough to have a boyfriend.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Yeah, it's Gibbs.
Emily Fornell: And how old do you need to be?
Tobias Fornell: A year older than you are, and every year it goes up by one.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Yeah. I'll meet you there.
Tobias Fornell: Where do you think you're going?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Got a dead body.
Emily Fornell: You're gonna have another one in your living room in a minute.
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Wasteland
Timothy McGee: Looks like Captain Green's a fan of The Nutcracker. Any witnesses?
Alexandra Quinn: Metro said that a witness saw him get into a rideshare car after the show.
Timothy McGee: Then five blocks away, here he lay dead in the dirt.
Alexandra Quinn: Must've been one hell of a ride.
Timothy McGee: No signs of foul play.
Alexandra Quinn: There sure is foul smells. Is this a dirt lot or a community toilet?
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Street
Eleanor Bishop: What's with the wardrobe change?
Nicholas Torres: You know how hard it is to get the smell of urine out of suede?
Eleanor Bishop: And that's something you're familiar with?
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Wasteland
James Palmer: What did happen to this man?
Alexandra Quinn: That's a good question. He's got a ton of money left in his wallet, so it can't be robbery.
Timothy McGee: We need to find out where he was headed and how he got here.
Alexandra Quinn: Maybe Reston.
Donald Mallard: Reston? I used to live in Reston on a beautiful tree-lined street on...
Timothy McGee: McCadden Place.
Donald Mallard: Yes. 1-0...
Timothy McGee: 7-3-5?
James Palmer: What is a dead man doing with your address in his pocket, Dr. Mallard?
Donald Mallard: I'm not sure I want to know the answer to that.
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NCIS: Squad room
Timothy McGee: Captain Mason Green. Served three back-to-back tours as an advisor in Iraq. Wife is deceased, has one grown daughter.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Do we know who picked him up from the theater, yet?
Alexandra Quinn: Still haven't found his cell phone, which would indicate the rideshare app he was using, Abby's on it, though.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Talk to the C.G.?
Timothy McGee: Yeah, and, uh, that's where it gets interesting.
Alexandra Quinn: Green was under internal investigation. Suspected of selling classified info.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: To who?
Timothy McGee: I.G. thinks it's someone overseas.
Alexandra Quinn: If Green's buyer knew he was under investigation, he might have gotten nervous and then took Green out.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Does I.G. have a lead on the buyer?
Timothy McGee: They're sending the file over now. In the meantime, all we have is this: Ducky's old address, which was in our dead guy's pocket. Ducky lived there with his mother years ago. Sold it when she died.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Six years ago.
Alexandra Quinn: I mean, maybe it's a coincidence... Oh. Oh, no. No. Rule 69: No coincidences.
Timothy McGee: No, actually number 69 is never trust a woman who doesn't trust their man.
Alexandra Quinn: Huh? Wait, what? Really? That... Sounds a little misogynistic, don't you think? Huh? I mean, do you have a rule that says "Never trust a man who doesn't trust his woman?" Think about it. Huh? No? Think about it. Rule 51.
Timothy McGee: Sometimes you're wrong. Agent Torres is, uh, down with Ducky. They're trying to see if they can figure out a connection to Captain Green.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Take Bishop with you, talk to the current owners. Maybe Green was looking for them, not Ducky. That Ducky was just a coincidence.
Alexandra Quinn: Was he mocking me?
Timothy McGee: You know, I'm not sure. I've never seen Gibbs mock anyone before.
----------
NCIS: Autospy room
Donald Mallard: I'm sorry. I simply do not recognize this man. Nor is his name remotely familiar.
Nicholas Torres: Do you have any files you can check or anything?
Donald Mallard: I can assure you, my memory is not at fault.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Check anyway.
Donald Mallard: But I'll check anyway.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: What have you got?
James Palmer: Abby found traces of conotoxin in his blood. It's a fast-acting poison, presumably the cause of death.
Donald Mallard: Which we will check on autopsy, of course.
Nicholas Torres: Hey, you mind waiting until I leave before you open this guy up?
James Palmer: What? I-I wouldn't have pegged you as the squeamish type.
Nicholas Torres: No. I actually like the sight of blood... It's just smell. You know, first the alley, now this place... Ugh. Here's a silly question. Do you guys, uh, you expense the dry-cleaning, right?
James Palmer: Oh, yeah. I do. Is that not okay?
Donald Mallard: As I suspected, yeah, there are no records of a Captain Green in my files.
Nicholas Torres: I heard you travel a lot. Maybe you met him on one of your trips?
Donald Mallard: Where has the captain been besides Iraq, that is?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: According to ICE, the only other place he's been is Majorca.
Donald Mallard: Majorca...
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Doc?
James Palmer: I am guessing the doctor has a story.
Donald Mallard: Well, oddly enough, Majorca is one place I haven't been. Although I-I do still have a story.
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Mallard's appartment: living room
Donald Mallard: Quick! Hurry! Gosh, it's monkeys out there.
Peg: Told you we should have taxied over after the film.
Donald Mallard: What? And miss the best part about getting cold?
Peg: What's that?
Donald Mallard: Getting warm.
Peg: Why don't we start with a hot toddy, Dr. Mallard? Take it from there.
Donald Mallard: I can work with that.
Peg: Your flat's really quite lovely. Not bad on a soldier's salary. You working for pin money on the side?
Donald Mallard: Actually, I wasn't entirely honest. This isn't my home, it belongs to my...
Peg: Oh, my God!
Donald Mallard: Mother! What are you doing here?
Victoria Mallard: I might ask you the same thing.
Donald Mallard: Raiding the liquor cabinet. You're supposed to be in Majorca.
Victoria Mallard: I got back early. Who's the tramp?
Donald Mallard: Mother.
Peg: Hello. My name is...
Victoria Mallard: Tramp will do nicely until proven otherwise. And so far, you're not off to a very good start.
Donald Mallard: Mother. We were simply stopping by... What was that?
Victoria Mallard: What? I didn't hear anything. And it's getting late, so if you don't mind, I'd like to get ready to...
Balthazar Kilmeany: Ah. Hello, young man. I'm afraid you've caught me at quite a disadvantage.
Victoria Mallard: Who the bloody hell are you?
Balthazar Kilmeany: Uh, Balthazar Kilmeany. Pleasure to make your acquaintance.
Victoria Mallard: We met at the resort in Majorca at a bagpipe class.
Balthazar Kilmeany: Your mother's got quite a set of lungs on her.
Donald Mallard: Right. I will throw up on you.
Victoria Mallard: Donald! Mind your manners.
Donald Mallard: Me?! You called my date a tramp.
Peg: Twice.
Donald Mallard: With a naked man in your wardrobe.
Balthazar Kilmeany: Uh, perhaps I ought to go. I have an important board meeting quite early.
Victoria Mallard: Put a sock in it. You're not going anywhere. They are.
Donald Mallard: I'm not going anywhere until you tell me exactly what's going on.
Victoria Mallard: What's going on is... We're in love... Well, aren't you going to say anything?
Donald Mallard: Yes... That's my hat.
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NCIS: Autospy room
James Palmer: Care to share?
Donald Mallard: Excuse me?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Said you had a story.
Donald Mallard: Oh, it's, it's not particularly... Relevant. And I just had breakfast.
Nicholas Torres: All right. Thanks, B. That was Bishop. The victim's daughter is here. Conference room.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Come on, Duck.
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NCIS: Conference room
Haley Chase: I don't understand. If it wasn't a robbery, who killed my father?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Trying to figure that out... This mean anything to you?
Haley Chase: No. What is it?
Donald Mallard: My old address.
Logan Chase: Did you know my father-in-law?
Donald Mallard: Not that I'm aware. Do I look familiar to you?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Your father mention having any trouble at work?
Haley Chase: Why? Was he in trouble at work?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Your father was being investigated for selling classified secrets.
Haley Chase: Uh-uh. No, no. Not-not my dad.
Donald Mallard: Has he been behaving strangely of late?
Haley Chase: Not at all.
Logan Chase: Actually... Last week he was asking some weird questions. Connections I might have overseas. I didn't really think anything of it at the time, but... Whatever it was about, if you knew her dad, there is no way these accusations are true.
Eleanor Bishop: Gibbs.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Need a second.
Eleanor Bishop: We just got back from Ducky's old house.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: You talk to the owners?
Eleanor Bishop: No. Gardener said they've been out of town over a month. But he did say Captain Green had been there three days ago.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Did he say why?
Timothy McGee: Green was looking for somebody.
Donald Mallard: He went to the house looking for me.
Timothy McGee: Well, he was looking for a Mallard.
Donald Mallard: I knew it.
Eleanor Bishop: But not you. He was looking for a Victoria Mallard.
Donald Mallard: Mother?
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NCIS: P.A. office
Nicholas Torres: If you need to take a break, let me know.
Clayton Reeves: Oh, have we started? I couldn't tell if you were trying or not.
Nicholas Torres: Oh, I didn't want to beat you too quickly. You seemed, uh... You know, and everyone's talking about it... Kind of fragile.
Clayton Reeves: Me, fragile? You're the one sweating.
Leon Vance: And I'm busy. So please finish comparing testosterone levels on your own time.
Nicholas Torres: To be continued.
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NCIS: Director's office
Leon Vance: I called you in here because I just spoke with SecDef. It appears Captain Green's work was more sensitive than the inspector general knew. If Green's really been compromised, DoD needs to know who is buying his stolen Intel A.S.A.P.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: I.G. Suspected it was someone overseas. Reeves?
Clayton Reeves: I pulled a favor with some mates of mine at Interpol, and they found a bank account in Captain Green's name in the Crimea.
Leon Vance: Crimea. That means the Russians.
Clayton Reeves: There's been several large deposits made over the last month.
Leon Vance: Did you trace them?
Nicholas Torres: I've been going through the paperwork. But so far, no luck. McGee's, uh, trying the gardener again to see if he knows anything.
Leon Vance: All right, dismissed. You can go crush beer cans against your foreheads or whatever you're planning next. Gibbs, did I read your report correctly, that Captain Green was looking for Dr. Mallard's mother?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Yep.
Leon Vance: The doctor have any idea why?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Nope.
Leon Vance: How's he taking it? I mean, I wouldn't be very happy knowing that my mother might somehow be connected to international treason.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: You never met Ducky's mother?
Leon Vance: No, never had the chance.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: This doesn't really rank.
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Street
Alexandra Quinn: So, Ducky lived here with his mother? For how long?
Timothy McGee: Until she died.
Mr. Rin: Hey! Careful! You're walking on my winter mulch!
Timothy McGee: Sorry about that, Mr. Rin. Agent McGee. We spoke briefly.
Mr. Rin: Yeah, hi.
Alexandra Quinn: We have just a few follow-up questions.
Mr. Rin: Oh, I bet. Donnie must have been surprised to hear that his dearly departed mom had a visitor.
Alexandra Quinn: Uh, you know Dr. Mallard?
Mr. Rin: Yeah, I worked for him when he lived here. He's a wonderful man. When Donnie decided to sell, the new owners insisted that I stay.
Timothy McGee: So you, uh, knew his mother, too?
Mr. Rin: Oh, yeah.
Timothy McGee: Now, you said you saw this man three days ago. Correct?
Mr. Rin: Yeah, he asked about Victoria, and I told him she passed away. Then he got in his friend's car and then left.
Timothy McGee: He had a friend with him? You catch his name?
Mr. Rin: No, he stayed in the car. And I didn't get a good look at him.
Alexandra Quinn: What about the car... The make or the model?
Mr. Rin: Um, I think it was red. Ish. Possibly green.
Timothy McGee: Mr. Rin, are you colorblind?
Mr. Rin: Yeah. How'd you know?
Alexandra Quinn: Well, maybe we can get some witnesses or...
Timothy McGee: Ooh. You know what, actually, we may not need to. That is an XJ-47 doorbell camera. Brand-new. You approach and it sends video straight to the cloud. That is so cool, huh?
Alexandra Quinn: No, not really.
Timothy McGee: Oh, yeah.
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NCIS: Squad room
Timothy McGee: Nice. Oh, look at this. This thing is cool. Seriously, admit it. This is cool.
Alexandra Quinn: Look, I don't want to judge you, but if you push me, I will.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: McGee, back it up... Freeze it... Right there.
Timothy McGee: That's the car. No plates.
Donald Mallard: Who's that in the car?
Timothy McGee: Captain Green was accused of selling classified data. Maybe that's his buyer?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Or the killer.
Timothy McGee: Or both. You, uh, recognize him, Ducky?
Donald Mallard: No.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: McGee, BOLO on the car.
Timothy McGee: Yeah.
Abigael Scuito: Better make that two. I was going through the footage, and this happened... Wait for it... And...
Timothy McGee: That looked very suspicious.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Like she said, two BOLOs.
Abigael Scuito: I have a lot more to say. Ducky, I need those tissue samples. File in. To the Bat Lab! Oh, hey. Look who it is. Emily, how are you?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Give me a second, Abbs.
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Emily Fornell: You and I need to talk.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: I'm a little busy.
Emily Fornell: Why haven't you kicked my dad out of your house?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: It's not for lack of effort.
Emily Fornell: This has gone on way too long.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: You don't think I know that?
Emily Fornell: So do something. I want to have Christmas dinner with my father. At home.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: I've tried. I have. I've tried. I don't know what the problem is.
Emily Fornell: So can I have your permission to take matters into my own hands? To do whatever I need to do?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Yes... Don't burn down my house.
Emily Fornell: Fine. Plan B then.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Women, Ducky.
Emily Fornell: My mother would have never let it get this far.
Donald Mallard: Yes, Diane was a formidable woman. When she made up her mind, nothing would stop her... Not unlike my mother.
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Hotel: entrance
Angus Clarke: I'm not sure I see the problem, Donnie.
Donald Mallard: Mother and Balthazar are engaged.
Angus Clarke: Well, congratulations.
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Hotel: restaurant
Angus Clarke: I think that's enough on the ornaments. I'm not paying you on commission.
Donald Mallard: It's only been six weeks.
Angus Clarke: Please tell me you're not developing some sort of weird Oedipal thing about your mother.
Donald Mallard: Ugh. Don't be a twonk. Me?
Angus Clarke: You're the one that's going barmy. Your mother's in love. What's the big deal?
Donald Mallard: Your father hated when you did that.
Angus Clarke: Well, he shouldn't have died and left this fine establishment to me then. Besides, this is for you. Clearly on some kind of sticky wicket. So do tell. What's the problem?
Donald Mallard: The problem is Mother hardly knows this man. And there's something off about him I can't quite put my finger on. I'm just worried that he's... Taking advantage of her in some way.
Angus Clarke: What do you want me to do about it?
Donald Mallard: Check him out. You know people, Angus. Find out who he is, where he comes from... Please.
Angus Clarke: All right. I can see you're upside-down about this. I'll do what I can.
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NCIS: Abby's lab
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Got something for me?
Abigael Scuito: I do. It's POW!-Nog. It's-it's eggnog meets Caf-POW! And it's my first batch of the season.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Something about the case.
Abigael Scuito: I can stand here all day.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Mm-hmm.
Abigael Scuito: You have a little, um... Never mind. Moving on. So, I examined Captain Green's computer. He had an account with a ridesharing service called HomeStretch. But they have no record of a pickup request the night of the murder.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Well, someone picked him up.
Abigael Scuito: Yeah, it looks like his account was infected with a worm that intercepted the request and then sent it to a third party. Probably the killer.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Can you trace it?
Abigael Scuito: I didn't trace that. But I did trace something else just as interesting. Take a look. Captain Green made a cell phone call right when he left Ducky's house.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: To who?
Donald Mallard: To whom, Jethro.
Abigael Scuito: Oh, good. My tissue samples. Fridge, please.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Whatever. To whom?
Abigael Scuito: Captain Green called a cell phone registered to a... Balthazar Kilmeany.
Donald Mallard: What did you say?
Abigael Scuito: Balthazar Kilmeany.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Yeah. You know him?
Donald Mallard: Yes. He was my mother's fiancé.
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NCIS: Conference room
Donald Mallard: Have you found out anything more about this Balthazar?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: No. Cell was registered to a post office box. We're still looking.
Leon Vance: We were hoping you might be able to shed a little light before I had to brief SecDef. You did know the man, after all.
Donald Mallard: No, I-I don't think I did. This Balthazar Kilmeany simply cannot possibly be the man I knew. He would be over 100 years old.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Duck, got to ask.
Donald Mallard: Okay... My mother... Met a man in Majorca. They fell madly in love. Became engaged. I didn't trust the man, and so I... I had a friend run a background check.
Leon Vance: And I gather that your fears were justified?
Donald Mallard: And then some.
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Hotel: restaurant
Balthazar Kilmeany: So the Scotsman replies very quickly, "I'd like to be shot first."
Victoria Mallard: Oh, my... Tell another one, Balthy.
Balthazar Kilmeany: Oh, please.
Angus Clarke: Actually, Ms. Mallard, I was, um, hoping to get your opinion on this new bourbon bar we're opening.
Victoria Mallard: Oh. It's a little early for a tipple. But since you've twisted my arm.
Angus Clarke: Ah!
Balthazar Kilmeany: Your mother... She does love her bourbon. Matter of fact, we were planning, for the wedding...
Donald Mallard: There isn't going to be a wedding.
Balthazar Kilmeany: Oh, come, Donald, I... I know things are moving rather quickly, and probably caught you a bit off-guard.
Donald Mallard: Let me be plain as a pikestaff. You are never going to marry my mother.
Balthazar Kilmeany: This isn't some kind of weird Oedipal thing, is it?
Donald Mallard: Contrary to popular opinion, I'm actually very happy my mother has fallen in love. Just not with a con man such as yourself. I did some checking. Balthazar Kilmeany isn't your real name. It's an alias.
Balthazar Kilmeany: Well, now, my mother will be quite surprised to hear that.
Donald Mallard: So will mine... Seems you have a history of hanging out in ritzy resort areas like Majorca, bilking rich, older women out of their money.
Balthazar Kilmeany: Donald, I can explain.
Donald Mallard: No, I doubt that very much.
Balthazar Kilmeany: This isn't what you think.
Donald Mallard: Right. And who am I to believe, you or my lying eyes?
Balthazar Kilmeany: Believe your eyes. You're right... It's all true... I have done all those things. But... This time it's... It's different. Yes, when I first met your mother, I... I planned to steal from her, but... But then something wonderful happened... I fell in love. For the first time in my life. I could never hurt Victoria. She's my soul mate... And I know she feels the same way.
Donald Mallard: Listen to me carefully. You are to depart England immediately. Tell my mother you have to leave on business or tend to a sick family member. Tell her whatever you like. But if you're not gone by tomorrow, this file is going straight to Scotland Yard. And you are going straight to Wandsworth Prison, got it?
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Gibbs's house: basement
Tobias Fornell: That is a hell of a story, Jethro... But I'm not surprised. All Ducky stories are good.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Mallet.
Tobias Fornell: But what if he's wrong? What if this new Balthazar is the same guy that was schtupping his mother, back for revenge?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: At 109?
Tobias Fornell: Some guys can hold a grudge. Or maybe his son, with the same name... Either way, how does he fit into the case?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Working on it.
Tobias Fornell: And who the hell is this guy? Okay. Fine. I got something else for you to do. Emily came by today. I met her new boyfriend. Nice kid. Nice looking. Just all-around... Nice... But... I need you to process this for prints. I need my own background check. I could do it myself, but I'm not back with the Bureau, so I can't access their lab... Oh, come on.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: It's against the law, Tobias.
Tobias Fornell: I'm not asking you to break the law. I am asking you to stretch it a little. Look what happened to Ducky's mother. You can't be too careful when you're... What? What is that?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: That's a termite... Who are you calling?
Tobias Fornell: My cousin. He's an exterminator. Got to nip this in the bud. You let this go too far, he might tent the whole house. And there goes my microfiber couch.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: That guy Emily's dating... What'd you say he was studying?
Tobias Fornell: Yeah, Mikey, it's Tobias. I got an Alpha Priority emergency here. Can you hold?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Yes, I can hold... Yeah, it's Gibbs... Uh, where? Yeah, okay, I'll meet you there.
Tobias Fornell: Where you going?
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NCIS: hallway
Timothy McGee: No word back on the gardener BOLO yet, but Metro PD found the guy who drove Captain Green to Ducky's old house in Rock Creek Park after a couple complained about him following him.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Okay. So who is he?
Timothy McGee: Well... Refused to say. Didn't have ID, but Metro's running his prints now.
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NCIS: interrogation room
Alexandra Quinn: So tell us why you were in the park.
Louis Lancaster: I was simply enjoying the day. That a crime?
Alexandra Quinn: No. But murder is... I say he knows our captain.
Louis Lancaster: What happened?
Eleanor Bishop: What happened was, Captain Green was selling government data.
Alexandra Quinn: And we think you were buying it.
Louis Lancaster: Excuse me?
Eleanor Bishop: When the feds started closing in, you took Green out.
Louis Lancaster: Are you out of your minds?
Alexandra Quinn: Oh, said the man who was picked up for stalking at, uh, Rock Creek Park an hour ago.
Louis Lancaster: I wasn't stalking anybody. I was doing my job.
Eleanor Bishop: What job?
Louis Lancaster: Yes, I was tailing the guy in the park. I'm a private investigator and I was hired by his wife to follow him.
Alexandra Quinn: And Captain Green?
Louis Lancaster: He hired me two weeks ago.
Eleanor Bishop: For what?
Louis Lancaster: To find out anything I could about the name Balthazar Kilmeany.
Alexandra Quinn: And?
Louis Lancaster: All I could find was an ad taken out in the personals from six years ago. Some lady named Victoria Mallard took it out. I guess she's looking for this Balthazar guy, too. We went to her house, heard she had died years ago. It was a dead end. I don't know why Green was looking for this guy.
Eleanor Bishop: And I suppose you don't know anything about Captain Green's murder, either?
Louis Lancaster: No. But, as it turns out, I think I might be able to help you.
Alexandra Quinn: How?
Louis Lancaster: Green gave me a hard drive to hold. For safekeeping. He called it an insurance policy in case anything ever happened to him.
Alexandra Quinn: I'd say something's happened to him.
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NCIS: Squad room
Nicholas Torres: All right, McGee and Abby are analyzing the drive now. But I got a copy of the ad that Ducky's mother took out. Personal ad, local newspaper. Just reads like a lonely old lady looking for her long-lost love. No offense.
Donald Mallard: None taken. Apparently that's exactly what my mother was.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: You knew about this?
Donald Mallard: No. In fact, I'm shocked that she had the wherewithal to place it, considering the progression of her Alzheimer's. I can only surmise she was thinking of happier times and trying to recapture them. Which meant trying to find her old fiancé.
Nicholas Torres: I get that, but why the hell was Captain Green looking for this guy?
Clayton Reeves: Whatever the reason, he was never going to find him. I just spoke to Interpol. Turns out the name Balthazar Kilmeany been popping up all over the world... Bank accounts, property deeds, but nothing tied down to an actual person.
Nicholas Torres: It's a fake identity. I've backstopped about 15 of these.
Clayton Reeves: Well, my contact believes this one was specifically created to launder money.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Created by who?
Clayton Reeves: Unknown. Looks like half a dozen people used this over the years. Your mother's fiancé was one of a list of con men who used the same alias.
Donald Mallard: Well, perhaps Captain Green was using it to launder the money that he made from selling classified data.
Abigael Scuito: Well, there's a funny thing about that. I just finished analyzing Green's hard drive. Captain Green didn't steal any classified data.
Nicholas Torres: Then why's he dead?
----------
Later
Timothy McGee: The insurance policy that Green gave the P.I. to hold onto contained internal DoD security footage.
Eleanor Bishop: They clearly show he was nowhere near a computer during the time when classified data was stolen.
Timothy McGee: He was set up.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: By who?
Timothy McGee: Someone that got ahold of his password, logged in remotely. Even the Crimean bank account... It's a setup. It's in Green's name, but he didn't open it. Person that opened the account is named...
Eleanor Bishop: Balthazar Kilmeany.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Green knew all this?
Timothy McGee: It's all on the hard drive.
Eleanor Bishop: So why didn't he go to the police? I mean, why go after this guy himself?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Why are you asking me? Go find out.
Eleanor Bishop: On it.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: And find that gardener. He ran for a reason. He knows something.
Timothy McGee: I'll check the BOLO.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Gibbs... What? Aw. You got to be kidding me. This is the worst possible time... No, you know what? I'm all right. Never mind. It's good... Thank you.
Eleanor Bishop: Uh, we get a break in the case?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Exterminator. My house has to be tented... Termites.
----------
NCIS: Autopsy room
Alexandra Quinn: Hey, Ducky. Got a sec? Abby dug up the old paperwork from your mom's ad. And I thought you might like a copy?
Donald Mallard: Thank you.
Alexandra Quinn: And, um, the local LEOs found your old gardener. Torres is bringing him in now.
Donald Mallard: Again, my thanks.
Alexandra Quinn: Ducky, is there anything you want to talk about?
Donald Mallard: No. I've... Talked enough.
----------
Young Donald Mallard: You made the right decision.
Donald Mallard: Did I?
Young Donald Mallard: Yes. Mother's fiancé was bent as a two-headed penny. A con man, a thief.
Donald Mallard: Even thieves fall in love.
Young Donald Mallard: Oh, rubbish... Making him leave was the right call. And, might I add, so is whatever you're doing with your skin. You look fantastic.
Donald Mallard: I'm not really complimenting myself, am I?
Young Donald Mallard: Oh, just take it... Look, that man would have broken Mother's heart. It's as simple as that.
Donald Mallard: We don't know that.
Young Donald Mallard: And if you had told her the truth, she would've been mortified that she fell in love with a sod like that.
Donald Mallard: It wasn't our decision to make.
Young Donald Mallard: But we made it. Why argue the toss now?
Donald Mallard: Because she was in love with him! And apparently she never let him go! I took away her one and only chance of finding true love. And she ended up alone the rest of her life.
Young Donald Mallard: So have you.
Donald Mallard: Which is why I understand exactly what I took from her. And it's something with which I just simply cannot make peace.
----------
Mallards's apartment: living room
Victoria Mallard: Something's happened to Balthazar, I just know it has!
Donald Mallard: Mother, please calm down.
Victoria Mallard: No. A week ago, we were planning a trip to Kenya to swim with hippos, and now he's gone.
Donald Mallard: Really?
Victoria Mallard: Yes. He-he left a note for me. Said he had to leave town on business, but would check in with me every day.
Donald Mallard: Well, how long has it been since you heard from him?
Victoria Mallard: Two weeks!
Donald Mallard: Perhaps he just needed a break. Things were moving rather quickly.
Victoria Mallard: That's what happens when you meet your soul mate.
Donald Mallard: Soul mate? Mother, you'd only just met him.
Victoria Mallard: Don't you patronize me, Donald Horatio Mallard! I've been around the block. I know what love is... Or thought I did... Until I met Balthazar. For the first time in my life, I was truly happy. And I know he was, too... And now he's gone... I don't know what happened... Oh, what am I gonna do?
Donald Mallard: Mother, I have something to tell you. As you know, I've volunteered to serve at the Jalozai Refugee Camp at the border of Pakistan.
Victoria Mallard: Oh, yes, I know. And your timing is dreadful, as usual.
Donald Mallard: But when my tour is up, I planned on moving to America.
Victoria Mallard: Oh, doesn't that just take the cake!
Donald Mallard: And I'd like you to come with me.
Victoria Mallard: To America? Where they mix bacon with syrup? Have you lost your mind?!
Donald Mallard: Come with me, Mother.
Victoria Mallard: You're a good boy, Donnie... You always were... But I don't know anyone in America. I'm not getting any younger. I don't have the energy to move to a new country. And besides, where would I live?
Donald Mallard: With me... You're welcome to stay with me as long as you need to get settled.
----------
NCIS: Interrogation room
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Tell us where you went after that.
----------
NCIS: Observation room
Timothy McGee: Found this on the App Store. Mr. Rin's Garden School.
Donald Mallard: What did I miss?
Nicholas Torres: Well, your former gardener's about to wet himself.
Timothy McGee: Did you code that yourself?
Donald Mallard: They don't think he's involved in all this, do they?
Mr. Rin: I've taken a few courses online.
Nicholas Torres: Oh, he's hiding something. And we're running out of suspects.
Timothy McGee: Must have been one hell of a class.
----------
NCIS: Interrogation room
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: They teach you how to steal passwords... Balthazar?
Timothy McGee: We know that you used Captain Green's password to steal classified data.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Fake the identity, launder the cash.
Timothy McGee: When Captain Green caught on, you had him killed.
Mr. Rin: I have no idea what you're talking about!
Timothy McGee: Getting anything wrong, just correct us.
Mr. Rin: I can't. I promised.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Who? What'd you promise?
Mr. Rin: Donald can never, ever know!
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Know what?!
Mr. Rin: That his mother and I were lovers.
----------
NCIS: Observation room
Donald Mallard: Did he just say what I think he said?
Nicholas Torres: Yes, he did.
----------
NCIS: Interrogation room
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Go on.
Mr. Rin: We became an item in the '90s. But Bubbles made me swear to never, ever say anything to Donnie.
----------
NCIS: Observation room
Donald Mallard: Bubbles?
----------
NCIS: Interrogation room
Timothy McGee: Bubbles?
Mr. Rin: I was 25 years her junior and not English, and for Victoria, that was scandalous.
Timothy McGee: If you and Ducky's mother were such a hot item, why did she take out an ad in the paper looking for an old fiancé?
Mr. Rin: She didn't. I did. In her delirium at the end, she thought she saw Balthazar in the street. So she asked me to place an ad to find him. I didn't feel slighted... She wasn't well... And I would have done anything for her... Look, you don't have to believe me. She wrote it all down in her diary, and she gave it to me when she got sick. And that's where I was going after your agents came to see me. All of their questions about Balthazar just made me nervous. So then I went home to make sure that the diary was still hidden.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Mm-hmm. Where?
Mr. Rin: In the garage.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: No. Where did Ducky's mother think she saw Balthazar?
Mr. Rin: Well, at the theater. Why?
----------
Outside the theater
Logan Chase: Well, that was really awesome.
Haley Chase: Please. You hated it. But... Thank you for not complaining.
Logan Chase: I know it's not the same without your dad.
Haley Chase: Just... I can't believe he's gone.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: You might not ever. I still wake up every morning, and I think the same thing about my dad.
Haley Chase: Hello, Agent Gibbs. Do you have news about my father's case?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Yeah. Yeah. Unfortunately, I do.
----------
NCIS: Autopsy room
Donald Mallard: So Logan was the nephew of the man my mother knew as Balthazar Kilmeany?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Her last Christmas, she thought she saw her fiancé at the theater.
Donald Mallard: Oh. Well, there's a resemblance. My mother did love The Nutcracker.
Eleanor Bishop: He apparently came from a family of con men. The Balthazar identity was like a family heirloom passed down to anyone who needed it.
Donald Mallard: And Logan was the next in line.
Eleanor Bishop: Claims his marriage to Green's daughter was real. But when he saw an opportunity to make some money, he just... Couldn't say no. And he started selling classified data to this man.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Captain Green suspected. He tried to handle it himself.
Eleanor Bishop: The buyer got nervous when he saw Green poking around, so he posed as his driver at the theater and killed him. Interpol just picked him up on his way to Moscow... Logan claims he had no idea his father-in-law was in danger, um, and we think he's telling the truth.
Donald Mallard: It's a tragedy indeed, but one with a silver lining. I've been reading this. My mother's diary. Mr. Rin makes quite an appearance.
Eleanor Bishop: Yikes.
Donald Mallard: Yes, I've been bleeding from my eyeballs all morning. However, the good news is, I learned something wonderful. It appears my mother was having a romance with Mr. Rin. And to think I was worried that I had... Well, suffice to say, knowing that my mother spent the last years of her life, well, head-over-heels in love is the best Christmas present I could possibly have.
Eleanor Bishop: Well, actually, we have one more.
Donald Mallard: Hmm?
Mr. Rin: Hello, Donald.
Donald Mallard: Mr. Rin!
Mr. Rin: Please, call me Takumi.
Donald Mallard: Uh-oh.
Abigael Scuito: Sorry. We didn't want to miss the reunion.
Donald Mallard: Well, come on in. It's only just started.
Alexandra Quinn: And we brought presents! Happy Christmas Eve!
Abigael Scuito: Cookies.
Eleanor Bishop: Wow!
Alexandra Quinn:Thank you.
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Duck. Duck.
All: Ducky!
----------
Fornell's house: living room
Emily Fornell: I thought maybe after dinner we could open some gifts.
Tobias Fornell: Uh-huh.
Emily Fornell: And watch Rudolph.
Tobias Fornell: Mmm.
Emily Fornell: Jack should be here soon.
Tobias Fornell: You mean the entomologist? Don't play dumb. I know what he helped you do.
Emily Fornell: What did we do?
Tobias Fornell: Bugged Gibbs' house, and pulled me out of summer camp before the session was over.
Emily Fornell: Summer camp?
Tobias Fornell: Yeah. When does a guy ever get to hang with a guy friend like that? Beer, late-night movies...
Emily Fornell: Braiding each other's hair. Dad, you're a grown man.
Tobias Fornell: Camp is over. Because you short-sheeted the bed.
Emily Fornell: I wanted you at home for Christmas. I missed you.
Tobias Fornell: I know. I missed you, too... Truth be told, I sort of got my fill of Gibbs. He's a horrible conversationalist. And there are only so many fireplace steaks and canned beans you can eat before... Oh. Good. There's the entomologist.
Emily Fornell: Be nice.
Tobias Fornell: Of course. I really need to thank him. He was actually the person who saved me from Leroy Jethro... Gibbs! What the hell are you doing here?
Leroy Jehtro Gibbs: Termites.
