MUSIC IN:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
(MUSIC OVER ACTION)
DUCKY: Mister Palmer! Mister Palmer! (SFX: MUFFLED MUSIC B.G.)
JIMMY: Yes, Doctor!
DUCKY: As a serious and dedicated student of anatomy… you are a serious and dedicated student of anatomy, are you not?
JIMMY: Uh-huh.
DUCKY: Well then, Mister Palmer, are you up to the task of identifying the reconstructive blunder that has been foisted upon our deceased?
JIMMY: Uh… uh…
DUCKY: Would you call that a thumb?
JIMMY: I would call that a toe.
DUCKY: Why then, perchance, did you place it with the other digits from his right hand?
JIMMY: Because that’s where it belongs. If you look at the scar line, it matches perfectly. Plus his right foot had a cleanly amputated big toe. This guy lost his thumb in an accident or something and had surgery to replace it with the big toe.
CUT TO:
INT. COURTROOM – FLASHBACK
(MONTAGE OF FLASHBACK COURTROOM SCENES)
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
DUCKY: My god. I think I know who this is.
(MUSIC UP AND OUT)
(THEME MUSIC UP OVER OPENING TITLE/SCENES/ CREDITS AND OUT)
MUSIC IN:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
“THE MEAT PUZZLE” (SFX: KEYBOARDING B.G.)
TONY: Mmm, I love Filomena’s ice cream.
KATE: Filomena’s in Georgetown?
TONY: My standard first date place.
KATE: I went there on a first date Saturday night.
TONY: Yeah? After dinner, I like to stroll the lucky lady down Wisconsin to this pretentious gallery called “Impressions.” Boy, they really eat it up.
KATE: That’s where we went after dinner.
TONY: Really? Huh.
KATE: You’ve been following me.
TONY: Me, follow you on a Saturday night? Not that desperate, Kate.
KATE: I don’t believe you.
TONY: Well, on my mother’s life I was not following you.
GIBBS: Your mother’s dead.
TONY: I didn’t follow her, boss. I do know her boyfriend, Steve Adler.
KATE: He’s not my boyfriend! I don’t believe this.
MCGEE: Did you tell her about your fraternity brother yet?
TONY: I was just getting to the good part there, McGee.
KATE: Steve Adler is your fraternity brother?
TONY: I’d show you the secret handshake, (WHISPERS) but then I’d have to kill you.
KATE: (WHISPERS) He told you about our date?
TONY: Well, not the intimate details… until I asked him. Then he had to. (WHISPERS) It goes with the oath.
KATE: Gibbs!
GIBBS: DiNozzo!
DUCKY: Jethro, I need you in autopsy.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
(SFX: DOORS SLIDE OPEN)
DUCKY: What he had was a great toe transplantation. An incredibly arduous surgical procedure. Nerves smaller than a human hair are connected using microscopic sutures.
GIBBS: They sewed his toe to his hand?
DUCKY: Exactly. In a catastrophic injury when the thumb is lost, the patient’s Hallux, or big toe, is removed and attached to the hand.
JIMMY: The opposable thumb is one of the most important milestones in human evolution. It’s what makes us, us. Our ability to make tools, a defining element which separates us from the animals, comes directly from this dexterity.
DUCKY: Drawn out digressions is a privilege earned, Mister Palmer.
JIMMY: Sorry, Doctor.
DUCKY: If I’m right, the victim’s name is Michael Grant. He was a Baltimore district attorney. Ten years ago I testified at several cases he was prosecuting.
GIBBS: About the other bodies, Duck.
DUCKY: Well, at this point I still have no idea who they are.
GIBBS: We need positive I.D.’s, Duck.
DUCKY: The flesh was peeled off the pads of the fingers.
JIMMY: That rules out fingerprints.
DUCKY: And the flesh and skin of the face has also been removed. So photographic identification won’t be possible either.
GIBBS: Dental?
DUCKY: Unless we can find a piece of Michael Grant’s DNA, the dental records will have to do.
GIBBS: Do it. (SFX: DOORS SLIDE OPEN)
DUCKY: Jethro, a barrel is left at Bethesda in my jurisdiction containing three dissected bodies, one of whom I knew. This isn’t a coincidence, is it? (BEAT) I didn’t think it was. (SIGHS)
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
GIBBS: Possible ID on one of the Meat Puzzle bodies. A D.A. named Michael Grant.
TONY: Hey cool! After six months, we finally got a lead, huh?
GIBBS: Find out if he’s been reported missing. Kate, pull the cases that Ducky testified where Michael Grant was the lead attorney.
KATE: On it.
TONY: Psst! Hey, it looks like we’re going to work late. So do you want me to call Steven and cancel your dinner reservation?
KATE: This is a nightmare.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
DUCKY: If you have a thought about continuing your genetic line, I would suggest a change of position.
JIMMY: Oh.
DUCKY: Jaws expand and contract, Mister Palmer. Teeth wear, but fillings, crowns, and bridges remain.
DUCKY: Now let’s see… four fillings on the lower left bicuspids. Crowns on the upper left molars.
JIMMY: It’s him.
DUCKY: Yes, it’s he.
JIMMY: Doctor Mallard, on a more personal note.
DUCKY: It’s not the best time, Mister Palmer.
JIMMY: I just want you to know that I am determined to learn from you.
DUCKY: Your point quickly.
JIMMY: Well, it’s important for me to know that you know that even though there are nearly two thousand pieces of tissue on these tables, that I…
DUCKY: Please come to the point, Jimmy!
JIMMY: I know the difference between a thumb and a toe.
DUCKY: Ah. (DUCKY WALKS O.S.)
JIMMY: He called me Jimmy.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
TONY: Michael Grant disappeared eight months ago hiking the Appalachian Trail. His body was never found. Local LEOs could never determine if he got lost or killed.
DUCKY: Definitely killed. The poor fellow was then dissected into small pieces, put in a barrel of alcohol along with two other bodies, and deposited in a dumpster behind Bethesda Naval Hospital.
GIBBS: Dental records matched?
DUCKY: I’m afraid so, Jethro.
KATE: Ducky, remember a Judge Roland Davis?
DUCKY: Of course. A man of small stature and enormous ego. A highly competent jurist, nonetheless.
KATE: He was the judge on one of the two cases you testified, where Michael Grant was the lead attorney.
DUCKY: The significance of that, Caitlin?
KATE: He was reported missing seven months ago.
DUCKY: I’ll run a dental comparison -- the judge with the other two bodies.
GIBBS: Pull up the case, Kate.
DUCKY: Oh, yes. Of course. Who could forget him? Vincent Hanlan. A medical school washout. He was studying to become a… medical examiner. He was accused of raping and murdering a Navy Lieutenant who worked at Bethesda Hospital’s pathology lab.
DISSOLVE TO:
INT. PATHOLOGY LAB – FLASHBACK
DUCKY: (V.O.) I performed the autopsy. She was a beautiful girl. I believe her name was Lieutenant Sylvia…
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
KATE: Sylvia Waksal.
DUCKY: Yes, that’s right. She was working late one night. Vincent Hanlan stalked her with the intention of raping her. The speculation was that he was unable to perform the rape.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – FLASHBACK
DUCKY: (V.O.) His impotence so enraged him that he proceeded to beat the poor girl to death.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
DUCKY: When it went to trial…
CUT TO:
INT. COURTROOM – FLASHBACK
DUCKY: (V.O.) … Michael Grant was the prosecuting attorney. Judge Davis presided. And I testified.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
DUCKY: The evidence was all circumstantial. So when the judge offered the jury second degree murder, they accepted it.
KATE: Vincent Hanlan served eight years in the Maryland Correctional Adjustment Center.
GIBBS: Kate, start building a profile on Vincent Hanlan. Tony…
TONY: Find the whereabouts of everybody else associated with prosecuting Vincent Hanlan and fast.
GIBBS: McGee, the last address for Vincent Hanlan. I want to bring him in. McGee!
MCGEE: Uh… sorry, boss. I already found him.
GIBBS: Give me the address.
MCGEE: It’s twenty two Victor Road, Mount Ephraim Cemetery. He’s been dead over a year.
(MUSIC UP AND OUT)
MUSIC IN:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
DUCKY: Crown, crown, match, match, filling, filling, match. As we feared, the second corpse is Judge Roland Davis.
GIBBS: Any guesses on number three here?
TONY: Carl Foss.
KATE: The jury foreman.
DUCKY: Of course!
TONY: Missing since last summer.
KATE: His x-rays are on the way over from his family dentist.
GIBBS: Are you okay, Duck?
DUCKY: I assume this macabre play is being put on for my benefit. My testimony was key in putting Vincent Hanlan in prison.
MUSICAL DISSOLVE TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – FLASHBACK
DUCKY: (V.O.) I was able to lift a partial print of Vincent’s off her body.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
DUCKY: Thinking back, I think I was slightly unnerved by Hanlan during the trial.
KATE: How so?
DISSOLVE TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – FLASHBACK
DUCKY: (V.O.) He just seemed particularly agitated when I was on the stand.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
KATE: You were the medical examiner he was never going to be.
DUCKY: I was using his failure against him.
GIBBS: You’ll stay at NCIS as much as possible. Other than that, one of us will be with you at all times.
DUCKY: Jethro, my mother is ninety-six years old. She suffers from dementia. She gets very nervous when I’m not home in the evenings.
GIBBS: Tony, you’ll take the first shift … with his mother.
TONY: Uh… doing what, boss?
GIBBS: Whatever she wants.
DUCKY: Yes, it would be helpful if you could assist with the dogs.
TONY: Oh, gosh. I’m not really an animal person, Ducky. I just haven’t spent a lot of time with them lately and…
DUCKY: The yappy creatures are all she has in this life… except for me, of course.
GIBBS: If Vincent Hanlan is dead, who is getting revenge?
KATE: His family?
GIBBS: Find them, Kate.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
KATE: According to their tax returns, Vincent Hanlan’s parents are both morticians. They’ve run a funeral home for the last thirteen years.
GIBBS: Siblings.
KATE: One brother who’s a taxidermist.
GIBBS: Mortician, taxidermist, wannabe medical examiner.
KATE: Yeah, the death obsession pretty much runs in the family.
MUSICAL BRIDGE TO:
INT. FUNERAL HOME – DAY
FRED: Vincent’s conviction tore the family apart. His death pretty much put us under. Through here.
CUT TO:
INT. EMBALMING ROOM – DAY
(DOOR OPENS)
FRED: Mary.
MARY HANLAN: Get these people out of here!
FRED: They’re federal agents.
MARY HANLAN: I don’t care!
FRED: They’re here about Vincent.
MARY HANLAN: They’re not authorized! Get out!
GIBBS: Individuals connected with Vincent’s prosecution have been found murdered.
MARY HANLAN: Good.
KATE: Good?
MARY HANLAN: Vincent was innocent. He was a good boy. He was in medical school.
GIBBS: Jack the Ripper went to medical school.
MARY HANLAN: When my son got out of prison, he had nothing left. No hope. No promise. They labeled him a sex murderer.
KATE: What was he doing when he got out of prison?
FRED: He was drinking a lot.
MARY HANLAN: Oh, that’s all you have to say about your dead son!?
FRED: That isn’t what I meant. I was trying to explain how difficult his life was.
GIBBS: What happened the night he died?
FRED: He was driving with his brother and they hit a tree.
KATE: Can you think of anyone who would want to get revenge on the men who put your son in jail?
MARY HANLAN: Me! But I don’t know anything about it, so why don’t you just get the hell out of here before I call the authorities and have you arrested and maybe you’ll go to prison! Bastards!
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
DUCKY: Two bridges, ten crowns, seven fillings. Not exactly a paragon of oral hygiene, my dear fellow.
JIMMY: Is he Carl Foss?
DUCKY: Was there ever any doubt? Well, that’s all three... prosecutor, judge, and now foreman of the jury.
JIMMY: Are you scared, Doctor Mallard?
DUCKY: Madame Curie, one of the world’s most brilliant thinkers, once said, “There is nothing in life to be feared. It is only to be understood.” I think it’s safe to say that Madame Curie never set her eyes on a meat puzzle. Yes, I’m scared. Scared as hell. Put them away, Jimmy. They’re tired of talking. They need to rest.
(DOOR OPENS/ CLOSES)
JIMMY: Yes, doctor.
CUT TO:
EXT. MALLARD HOME – DAY
VICTORIA (V.O.) Keep it down -- (KNOCK ON DOOR)
(SFX: DOGS BARKING)
(DOOR OPENS)
VICTORIA: Yes?
TONY: I’m Anthony DiNozzo, Mrs. Mallard. I work with your son. He called, said I’d be coming over.
VICTORIA: You’re Italian!
TONY: Yes, I am.
VICTORIA: You’re a gigolo.
TONY: Ah… well, I wouldn’t exactly call--
VICTORIA: You move furniture.
TONY: I could.
VICTORIA: I have a commode that has no business being here. It belongs in the lounge. I’ve told Donald this. He never listens.
TONY: I understand. Okay. If you’ll just show me where you want the --
(SFX: DOGS GROWL)
VICTORIA: Who are you?
TONY: Anthony DiNozzo. Everyone calls me Tony.
VICTORIA: That’s an Italian name.
TONY: Yes, it is. So if you’ll just show me where …
VICTORIA: Oh… gigolo. If you look down my blouse, I shall disembowel you!
TONY: (LAUGHS) That’s funny.
VICTORIA: I have a knife in my brassiere.
TONY: I’ll keep that in mind.
VICTORIA: Good! Who are you again?
CUT TO:
INT. HANLAN’S WORKSHOP – DAY
JONATHAN: Couldn’t there be another case where these men worked together?
GIBBS: I haven’t found one.
KATE: Your brother’s case is the common link.
JONATHAN: I would love to have stuffed Vincent. (CHUCKLES) He would’ve liked that. He had a good sense of humor, Vincent did. But it’s against state law. Oh! Best mammal at the regionals last year. Like anything else, you get obsessed. Becomes a way of life.
KATE: I thought pandas were endangered?
JONATHAN: Oh, they are. “Re-Creation Category.” I took two black bears and bleached one. And then I sewed them together in a panda pattern.
GIBBS: Do you miss your brother?
JONATHAN: He’s my brother.
GIBBS: Did you two get along?
JONATHAN: When he got out of prison, he was depressed. He couldn’t go back to school. He couldn’t get a job. He started drinking heavily.
GIBBS: You didn’t answer my question.
JONATHAN: We were close. And I have no idea who killed the men that put him in jail.
KATE: What happened the night he died?
JONATHAN: Vincent was driving. He lost control. We went off the road into the woods. My head hit the dash hard. I stumbled out of the car. I fell to my knees. When I got my bearings, I saw the car was on fire.
KATE: Do you feel guilty you didn’t pull him out?
JONATHAN: I was told he died instantly from the impact. That he never felt the flames. I think he felt the flames. Oh! Second place, Nationals. Small animal division. African civet.
(SFX: PHONE RINGS)
GIBBS: (INTO PHONE) Yeah, Gibbs. (BEGIN TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
(SCENE CUT)
MCGEE: (INTO) Boss, I’ve been running down other people involved in the Vincent Hanlan case. I’ve got something good.
(SCENE CUT)
GIBBS: (INTO PHONE) Spit it out, McGee.
MCGEE: (V.O./FILTERED) The lead Detective in the Hanlan …
(SCENE CUT)
MCGEE: (INTO PHONE) …Case was a Baltimore officer named Marco Cesaretti. He retired in ninety six. Missed his last rent payment. Nobody’s seen him in three weeks.
(END TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
CUT TO:
INT. MALLARD HOME – DAY
TONY: Where do you need this? Oh, God. Mrs. Mallard? Mrs. Mallard!?
VICTORIA: Who are you!? And where are you going with my commode!
TONY: I’m your son’s co-worker. Remember? Tony DiNozzo, the Italian gigolo furniture mover.
(SFX: DOOR BELL RINGS)
(SFX: DOGS BARK)
TONY: No!
(VICTORIA SHOUTS/KNIFE FALLS TO THE GROUND)
TONY: I’m a Federal Agent, Ma'am.
VICTORIA: That’s what they all say.
(SFX: DOORBELL RINGS)
TONY: Will you please go stand over there? Now! And keep the girls and boys in the other room.
VICTORIA: Stay. Quiet down.
TONY: What is it?
DELIVERY MAN: Delivery!
TONY: What kind of delivery?
DELIVERY MAN: I don’t know, Sir. It just says perishable.
(DOOR OPENS)
DELIVERY MAN: Hi.
TONY: Step back, please! Step back!
DELIVERY MAN: Okay!
TONY: Thank you.
(MUSIC UP AND OUT)
MUSIC IN:
EXT. MALLARD HOME – DAY
(PHOTO FLASHES)
DUCKY: Victim number four, Jethro. The size of the pieces, the cuts, are all consistent with the bodies of the D.A., the judge and the foreman.
GIBBS: The homicide detective completes the team.
DUCKY: You’re forgetting the Medical Examiner, Jethro, whose testimony put Vincent Hanlan behind bars.
JIMMY: That’s you!
DUCKY: Very good, Mister Palmer. He’s saving the best for last.
GIBBS: It’s not going to happen, Duck.
MCGEE: Boss.
DUCKY: You may load it, Mister Palmer.
JIMMY: Right. Should I…uh… roll it?
DUCKY: Well, one could do that, but I think it might be easier if you used the hand trolley.
JIMMY: Oh, oh, of course. I was so distracted by its contents, I didn’t notice it.
DELIVERY MAN: Here. Let me help you with this.
MCGEE: The guy, who works for an independent delivery service downtown, picked up the barrel from a new client on Twenty-seventh Street. That’s the order.
GIBBS: Universal Scrap Metal.
MCGEE: The owner called it in. The print’s kind of small. Even I had trouble reading it.
GIBBS: Print’s fine, McGee. Jeffrey… Jeffrey Winston.
MCGEE: Actually, it’s Jeffrey Wilson. But you’re very close, Boss.
GIBBS: Are you sure it’s Wilson?
CUT TO:
INT. PORCH – DAY
KATE: Gibbs is right. Whoever he is, he’s not going to get you.
DUCKY: There is only one thing better than looking into the eyes of a beautiful woman and have her say that everything is going to be all right.
KATE: And what’s that, Ducky?
DUCKY: My saying it to her.
JIMMY: All loaded, Doctor!
GIBBS: You stick to him like…
KATE: Glue.
GIBBS: An ex-wife after an alimony check.
KATE: (LAUGHS) Gibbs, what did Ducky look like when he was younger?
GIBBS: Ilya Kuryakin.
(TONY LAUGHS)
TONY: The sweet smell of freedom!
GIBBS: Mrs. Mallard?
TONY: Sleeping. Her usual afternoon fistful of Wild Turkey. Her last words to me were either “I’m going to slit your throat” or “kiss your moat.” I couldn’t tell because she was slurring.
GIBBS: That’s good work, Tony.
TONY: Thank you, boss. So who’s taking over for me now?
GIBBS: Kate’s on protection detail with Ducky.
TONY: Yeah.
GIBBS: McGee’s going with me to interview the guy who delivered the barrel.
TONY: Yeah.
GIBBS: I guess that leaves you.
TONY: Me? Boss, I just spent all day playing furniture mover for this slightly demented old lady and her pack of yapping hounds.
GIBBS: They’re not hounds, DiNozzo. They’re Corgis!
TONY: No, Boss! No, Boss! I’m on the verge, man! McGee?
(SFX: CAR STARTS)
TONY: (SHOUTS) Boss, I’m going to go postal! I’m not kidding! I’m this close!
(SFX: DOGS BARK)
TONY: Here’s Tony! Come on. Here you go. Guys, come on. We’ve got treats in the house. In the house! We’ve got treats. Good boy, Tyson.
CUT TO:
EXT. SCRAP YARD – DAY
WILSON: Are you going to badge me? That’s what they say on T.V.
GIBBS: NCIS. Naval Criminal Investigative Service.
WILSON: I know what it stands for. I wasn’t always in the junk business. U.S.S. Forestal. Machinist’s Mate First Class.
GIBBS: Are you Jeffrey Wilson?
WILSON: This is about that barrel, ain’t it? I knew that deal was too good.
GIBBS: Tell us about that.
WILSON: Well, this dude comes in. He buys a few of those.
GIBBS: Where’d you get them?
WILSON: Back of plants, factories. They don’t want ‘em. I clean ‘em up, resell ‘em.
GIBBS: Okay. Go on.
WILSON: Well, the dude brings one of them back. It’s got some kind of liquid in it ‘cause I can hear it sloshing around. So first I thought it might be some stuff to make meth. He offers me two hundred bucks to messenger it someplace in Reston.
MCGEE: Probably didn’t give his real name.
WILSON: No name, no address. He didn’t tell me what was in it. And I didn’t ask.
GIBBS: I need you to come by the Navy Yard, sit down and describe him to a sketch artist.
WILSON: Won’t do no good. Dude always wore a hooded sweatshirt and shades. He could’ve been Elvis. What was in that barrel anyway?
GIBBS: A meat puzzle.
CUT TO:
INT. NCIS LAB – DAY
(MUSIC PLAYS B.G.)
ABBY: Oh! Gibbs, you scared me.
GIBBS: Come on, Abs. You sleep in a casket dressed in a funeral gown.
ABBY: I don’t always wear the gown.
GIBBS: Too much information. What do we got here?
ABBY: Straight to the point. That’s our Gibbs. Okay, bottom line. The sicko that’s killing everyone that sent Vincent Hanlan to jail is definitely not Vincent Hanlan.
ABBY: Before Ducky went to see his mom, he checked the dental x-rays with those from the Maryland Correctional Adjustment Center.
GIBBS: Vincent Hanlan is in the casket.
ABBY: Every last inch of what is probably very rotting flesh at this point.
GIBBS: What about a DNA testing?
ABBY: Maryland incinerates all biological evidence three years after sentencing.
GIBBS: Okay, find an earlier x-ray. Before he went to prison.
ABBY: Before? Before.
CUT TO:
INT. MALLARD HOME – DAY
(DOOR OPENS)
DUCKY: Mother, I’m home!
KATE: Your dogs.
DUCKY: Not just dogs, Kate. Welsh Corgis. In Wales the Corgi was the protector of the farmer. Now they protect my mother. That’s Tyson.
KATE: Because he thinks he’s a boxer?
DUCKY: No, because he bites. The bedrooms are upstairs, of course. Mine’s there. You could use the guest room.
KATE: I won’t be sleeping, Ducky.
DUCKY: Of course.
KATE: Where’s your mother’s room?
DUCKY: Oh, she sleeps down here now.
KATE: It must be difficult for her to get up the stairs at her age.
DUCKY: It has nothing to do with stairs, Caitlyn. Her snoring is deafening. She kept me awake all night. She’ll keep you awake, too. Hello.
CUT TO:
INT. DINING ROOM – DAY
(SFX: HAIRDRYER B.G.)
DUCKY: Hello? (DOOR OPENS)
VICTORIA: There you are, Contessa. You’re beautiful.
(SFX: KATE LAUGHS)
KATE: Oh Tony, you finally found your true calling.
DUCKY: Mother, may I present Caitlyn. She works with Tony and me.
(SFX: VICTORIA SPITS)
DUCKY: Mother! We talked about this! Caitlyn is here to protect us.
VICTORIA: Show me your knickers.
KATE: Um… Ma'am?
VICTORIA: Your underwear, missy. One can always tell a woman’s intention from her panties.
TONY: That’s always been my philosophy.
DUCKY: I do apologize. Come along, Mother! Time to get dinner ready.
VICTORIA: Haven’t I had dinner?
DUCKY: No you haven’t.
VICTORIA: Well, use butter tonight. You always use bacon fat.
DUCKY: I use canola oil.
VICTORIA: I can tell that, too.
TONY: Sometimes older people can make so much sense.
KATE: You’re relieved, Tony.
TONY: Oh, god. Okay, this is Contessa. She likes it rough.
KATE: Good night, Tony.
TONY: Yeah, look at the time. I’ve got to meet Steven for a beer. Hate to be late. So much to catch up on.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
(SFX: PHONE RINGS)
GIBBS: (INTO PHONE) Yeah, Gibbs.
CUT TO:
INT. LAB – DAY
ABBY: (INTO PHONE) Vincent Hanlan’s dental x-rays just arrived from medical school.
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
GIBBS: McGee, you’re with me. Come on.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
JIMMY: These x-rays were taken at Vincent Hanlan’s autopsy. And these were eleven years ago in medical school. And if you look closely, you can see a perceptible difference due to molar wear, which is highly unusual given the short span of years, at least in modern man. In Neolithic man, who used to gnaw a lot of bones, you know, it could incur these kinds of…
GIBBS: Are you telling me these x-rays match?
JIMMY: I’m afraid so. The fillings in the upper third molar and second bicuspid are identical, as are the shape of the teeth.
GIBBS: He gnaws on bones like a caveman?
JIMMY: I can’t explain that.
MCGEE: He grinds his teeth, boss. I did it as a kid in my sleep. Had to wear a special retainer at night.
ABBY: You still should.
GIBBS: I want Vincent Hanlan’s body exhumed.
JIMMY: Why? I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that, Sir. It just… it just spewed out.
GIBBS: Abby, call Mount Ephraim Cemetery. McGee, you’re with me. You dig up that body!
ABBY: Love to!
JIMMY: He’s supposed to get a judge’s authorization. He didn’t even give us a reason why!
ABBY: Well, obviously Gibbs doesn’t think that Hanlan is dead.
JIMMY: He is dead. Dental x-rays don’t lie.
ABBY: Well, either Gibbs is wrong or Hanlan is one of the dead that still walks at night.
JIMMY: Okay, well then Gibbs is wrong. Isn’t he?
CUT TO:
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
(SFX: DOG BARKS O.S.)
(MUSIC OVER ACTION/KATE WALKS THROUGH THE HOUSE)
CUT TO:
EXT. YARD – NIGHT
KATE: Mrs. Mallard? Mrs. Mallard. (SFX: DOG CONTINUES BARKING B.G.)
VICTORIA: Sneaking off after having your fun. Just as I knew you would.
KATE: No, it’s not like that, Mrs. Mallard. Now please, I need you to take your dog and go back inside.
VICTORIA: That’s not my dog.
KATE: Of course it’s yours. Now, please, Mrs. Mallard!
VICTORIA: I’ve never seen that dog before in my life. I only have Corgis.
KATE: Get back inside now!
CUT TO:
INT. MALLARD HOME – NIGHT
KATE: (SHOUTS) Ducky! Ducky!
CUT TO:
EXT. HOUSE – NIGHT
(KATE RUNS FROM THE HOUSE)
(SFX: CAR DOOR CLOSES)
(SFX: CAR TIRES SCREECH)
KATE: (SHOUTS) Ducky!
(MUSIC OUT)
MUSIC IN:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – DAY
KATE: Gibbs, I’m sorry.
GIBBS: It’s my fault. Two agents…
KATE: Excuse me?
GIBBS: Two protectees. I should have had two agents. You were as responsible for the mother as you were for Ducky.
(SFX: DOORS SLIDE OPEN)
TONY: Boss! Abby says the tire tracks from the van were made from Uniroyal Laredos. They’re standard on Chevy Express cargo vans.
MCGEE: Both the funeral home and the taxidermy business own Chevrolet Express Cargo vans.
GIBBS: That’s good enough for a search authorization.
TONY: On it.
GIBBS: Tony, you and Kate take the turkey stuffing brother. McGee, come on. You’re with me.
CUT TO:
INT. FUNERAL HOME – DAY
MARY HANLAN: You have no right to invade my home and my business.
MCGEE: Actually, that search warrant says we do, Ma'am.
MARY HANLAN: Don’t Ma'am me you simpering wimp!
MCGEE: No, Ma'am.
GIBBS: Unlock this door.
MCGEE: Ma'am, if you impede our search in any way, you will be charged with obstruction.
GIBBS: That’s not the way to do this. I have the right to break down that door, and anything in my way.
CUT TO:
INT. CREMATORIUM – DAY
MARY HANLAN: Are you satisfied?
GIBBS: No. McGee, take a scraping from inside. One son beats a young woman to death, the other one plays with dead animals. I wonder where they get that.
MARY HANLAN: From their mother.
CUT TO:
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – DAY
JIMMY: Same teeth. Vincent Hanlan’s corpse matches his autopsy x-rays.
ABBY: Teeth don’t lie, Jimmy. (BEAT) What?
JIMMY: Do you think… you could get a blood type from the nerve tissue in this tooth?
ABBY: If I can rehydrate it. What are you thinking?
JIMMY: I’m thinking something crazy, Abby.
ABBY: Crazy is good.
MUSICAL BRIDGE TO:
INT. COFFIN STORAGE ROOM – DAY
(SFX: SCREW GUN B.G.)
MCGEE: It’s heavier. Definitely something in this one.
MARY HANLAN: Mister Goldberg. He’s being buried in the morning.
GIBBS: Check underneath Mister Goldberg.
(MUSIC OVER ACTION/MCGEE SEARCHES THE CASKET)
MCGEE: There’s nothing.
MARY HANLAN: I’ll inform the Goldbergs their grandfather was frisked by NCIS in his coffin. They’re litigators.
CUT TO:
EXT. FUNERAL HOME – DAY
(MUSIC OVER ACTION/TRUCK PULLS AWAY FROM THE HOME)
CUT TO:
INT. FUNERAL HOME – DAY
MCGEE: Boss, the van is on the way to the garage for forensics. What next?
MARY HANLAN: Why don’t you just admit that you made a mistake and get the hell out of here.
(SFX: PHONE RINGS)
GIBBS: (INTO PHONE) Gibbs. (BEGIN TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
(SCENE CUT)
TONY: (INTO PHONE) No joy, Boss. We’ve looked under every furry creature and inside a couple. Ducky’s not here.
(SCENE CUT)
GIBBS: (INTO PHONE) Yeah, I knew you’d find something, DiNozzo. That’s good work, Tony. You bring him in for interrogation.
(SCENE CUT)
TONY: (INTO PHONE) Did you hear what I said, Boss?
(SCENE CUT)
GIBBS: (INTO PHONE) Yeah! Yeah, I heard you. (CHUCKLES) Let’s go, McGee. (END TELEPHONE INTERCUTS)
MCGEE: What’d they find?
(DOOR OPENS/CLOSES)
FRED: Jonathan called. They’re searching his shop, too.
MARY HANLAN: What do they think, he’s stuffed their precious doctor?
FRED: Mary, we should do something to prevent…
MARY HANLAN: Fred… Fred. Shh… shh… shh. Don’t start thinking now. You’re far too old for that.
CUT TO:
INT. INTERROGATION ROOM – DAY
JONATHAN: I already told you.
GIBBS: Tell me again.
JONATHAN: We crashed into a tree.
GIBBS: Vincent was driving?
JONATHAN: Yes.
GIBBS: You jumped out of the car?
JONATHAN: That’s right.
GIBBS: You didn’t even attempt to help your brother?
JONATHAN: The car was on fire. I was in a daze.
GIBBS: But you didn’t even try.
JONATHAN: It was too hot! There was no way I could get to him.
GIBBS: What did your mother think about that?
JONATHAN: I wouldn’t know. We don’t talk. We haven’t spoken since that night.
GIBBS: Yeah? Why is that?
JONATHAN: He was her favorite.
GIBBS: She blames you for his death. If my friend dies, I’ll blame you, too.
KATE: (V.O./FILTERED) Gibbs, Jimmy Palmer ….
CUT TO:
INT. OBSERVATION ROOM - DAY
KATE: …and Abby need to see you.
(DOOR OPENS)
JIMMY: I pulled one of Vincent Hanlan’s teeth and gave it to Abby.
ABBY: We did a blood analysis of the nerve tissue and compared it to the blood type of the tissue from the corpse.
ABBY AND JIMMY: (IN UNISON) They didn’t match.
JIMMY: These are Vincent Hanlan’s teeth, but they were put into this jaw. This body is not Vincent Hanlan’s.
ABBY: I did a gas chromatograph and I found traces of Cyanoacrylate on the bottom of the--
GIBBS: In a language I speak, Abby.
ABBY: There is Super Glue on the root of the tooth.
JIMMY: Just a drop. It would never show up on an x-ray.
KATE: So the teeth were pulled from Vincent’s mouth?
JIMMY: One by one. And then they were glued back into this jaw.
CUT TO:
INT. INTERROGATION ROOM - DAY
GIBBS: Homo sapien. Reconstruction category. Someone took your brother’s teeth and put them in that skull.
JONATHAN: It wasn’t me. It was them. It’s always them.
GIBBS: Your mother and Vincent?
JONATHAN: Vincent was drunk the night he slammed into that tree. We got out just before it burst into flames. When we got home, Mother had a car crash body laid out on the embalming table. Closed-casket job. She came up with the idea of giving Vincent a new life.
CUT TO:
INT. OBSERVATION ROOM - DAY
TONY: He’s got to be telling the truth.
KATE: Why?
TONY: Who would make that up?
JONATHAN: (MUFFLED) After she extracted Vincent’s teeth and put them in the car-crash body…
CUT TO:
INT. INTERROGATION ROOM - DAY
JONATHAN: She burnt the corpse beyond recognition.
GIBBS: Where is Vincent?
JONATHAN: (CRYING) With Mother. He’s always with Mother.
GIBBS: We already searched the funeral home.
JONATHAN: Look harder!
GIBBS: Is Doctor Mallard there?
JONATHAN: Probably.
GIBBS: They don’t keep you informed?
JONATHAN: They have lots of secrets. Terrible secrets with each other.
GIBBS: You call your mother, Jonathan. You tell her we’ve released you. You tell her that everything is okay now, that we had run into a dead end. You convince her, Jonathan. If you don’t, I will tear every tooth out of your skull!
MUSICAL BRIDGE TO:
INT. STORAGE ROOM – NIGHT
(DOOR OPENS)
MUSICAL BRIDGE TO:
EXT. FUNERAL HOME – DAY
GIBBS: I got a light.
TONY: Let’s go.
GIBBS: Wait.
TONY: For what?
GIBBS: Let them get Ducky out of wherever they’ve been hiding him.
TONY: Now?
GIBBS: Not yet. Okay, get into positions.
CUT TO:
INT. EMBALMING ROOM – NIGHT
VINCENT: It’ll only take four minutes to drain your blood. Versus eight years in the same cell, twenty four hours a day.
MARY HANLAN: He’s getting off easy, Angel.
(SFX: DUCKY’S MUFFLED CRIES B.G.)
CUT TO:
INT. FUNERAL HOME – NIGHT
(MUSIC OVER ACTION/DOOR CRASHES OPEN)
CUT TO:
INT. HALLWAY – NIGHT
GIBBS: Where are they?
MCGEE: Turn around! Hands out! He’s clean.
CUT TO:
INT. EMBALMING ROOM – DAY
(DOOR OPENS)
GIBBS: Get back!
(SFX: MUFFLED DUCKY CRIES CONTINUE)
GIBBS: Move back or you’re dead! Tony?
DUCKY: My hands. Release my hands! Get me something to stop the bleeding!
KATE: Hands in the air!
VINCENT: I can’t go back there.
MARY HANLAN: Just do what they say, Vincent.
GIBBS: Turn around! Face the wall!
MARY HANLAN: Just do it.
VINCENT: I love you, Mother, but I can’t do this again!
MARY HANLAN: (SCREAMS) No! No! My god, no! Oh my god no! No god, they killed my son!
KATE: Come on, let’s go! (MARY SOBS HYSTERICALLY)
DUCKY: You’re the one that got off easy, my boy. What kept you?
CUT TO:
INT. SQUAD ROOM – NIGHT
TONY: The mother finally give a statement?
GIBBS: Yeah, short one. Two words.
TONY: So, you seeing my frat brother tonight?
KATE: As a matter of fact, I am. Steven feels bad. Said he’d like to make it up to me.
TONY: How’s he going to do that?
KATE: By telling me things about you.
TONY: Never gonna happen. The Fraternal oath is sacred.
KATE: Some things are even more sacred, Tony.
(MUSIC UP OVER ENDING CREDITS AND OUT)
* * * * * * * *
Prepared by C.C. Printed in USA
Calvert Continuities Aired 2/8/05
